Persona (1966)

This was more of an experience then a film. If you take all the emotion you ever felt from the viewing of any film and multiply it by a thousand, then you get close to what I just felt watching Persona. The first five minutes of fast, flashing, introduction of surrealist imagery, which subsequently creates the basis for the plot, are the most unsettling and stomach churning I've seen in a film.

The only way I can explain what this film made me feel is like being trapped in someone else's depressed mind (if that makes sense.) The viewer becomes immediately enveloped in the ever increasing feeling of unease and tension as the nurse and her silent patience's minds become melded in a chaos of self-examination, reverse psychology and dependency. Everything in this film is measured to perfection: the sound effects and camera work are amazing, and I especially liked the kind of intermission crafted from sharp sounds and images used to signal a breaking point in the relationship of the two women.

Toward the end of the film, when the truth is revealed about the silent actresses past and cause of her silence, every scene is amazingly tense, powerful and brilliantly filmed. The drip-drop sound effect,  which reappeared throughout the film, is eerily effective and cuts right straight through you. Obviously, I have a lot of unanswered questions, which isn't surprising for a film this complex, which has been studied for years, and will require multiple re-viewings to interpret, (Which I'm looking forward to). At first, I was a little dubious before watching the film, as I thought it might be a little too complex for it's own good (and mine.) But instead it has quenched my thirst for this kind of cinema - a kind I watch far too little of.

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Get Hard (2015)

It's films like this that are ensuring the demise of the comedy.To start with, I don't think Will Ferrell is funny at all. He is one of the new breed of American comedians whose sense of humour and comedic style seems to completely escape me. The new style I'm talking about is present in most American sit-coms, The Big Bang Theory is a perfect example. Obliviously Americans and Brits have differing sense of humour, because our TV show have always been different, but as far as films go there used to be really funny America films; the 80's and 90's where the golden years, and produced some real classics.

This new breed of comedy films are badly scripted and the humour is completely reliant upon completely contrived and extremely unlikely scenarios; everything has to be taken to the extreme just to produce a reaction. I want to go back to the eighties style, with a well-scripted, subtle, and altogether more effective style of comedy - the films of the late John Hughes are a perfect example.

As far as Get Hard is concerned, Will Ferrell is just annoying throughout and the plot is ridiculous. As a millionaire banker who is accused of fraud, he has been given 10 years in prison, and 30 days to prepare before he goes to the slammer. So, he employs the services of a car washer who works in the basement of his office building. The basis for which is the usual racial stereotypes that are strew throughout the film. He transforms his mansion into a prison and learns how to fight... And under the presumption that he will be sexually assaulted in prison, he goes to a gay bar and asks a man if he can suck his appendage. The subsequent toilet scene is just sickening rubbish, typical of these kinds of comedies. Most of the film is the same old ridiculous scenarios and extreme reactions to practically nothing. There are a few laughs along the way, but not many, and I think this will be the last Will Farrell film I will watch. This tripe has put me off watching comedies altogether to be honest.

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Blade Runner (1982)

Having seen Blade Runner in its several different incarnations around forty times over the years, I may have been forgiven for getting a little tired of the film. However, after viewing The Final Cut of the film at the cinema last night, I found myself covered liberally in goosebumps and left in awe of the brilliance of what I was watching. The opening scene of a fast, fire-breathing industrial landscape combined with the haunting Vangelis score, had the same effect on me as it always has - amazement.

 From the start I was seamlessly immersed in the intoxicating atmosphere of a rainswept, polluted, and over crowded dystopian Los Angeles. Very loosely adapted from the Philip K. Dick novel Do Androids dream of Electric Sheep the film maintains the basis of the books story and the questions it asks the reader. The question of life to put it simply - what is it, can man create it, should he - questions we will no doubt one day have to answer. Whilst the plot of the film is quite simple, the film is full of ambiguous overtones, both philosophical and ethical. There is one fundamental question asked by this dark dystopian story, where men have practically become gods with their mastery of genetic engineering: what makes us human?

 Rutger Hauer’s performance is outstanding. As a replicant seeking to live longer, he ironically seems to be the most alive of all the characters in the film. In contrast with Deckard, who seems to be in a constant state of apathy. The "Tears in the Rain" ending of the film always has an effect on me, but in the cinema it was an altogether different experience - the greatest experience I've had to date.

 The combination of dystopian sci-fi and film noir blend perfectly to create a dark, melancholy atmosphere. The city itself has it has a life of its own - probably the most effective vision of a dystopian city ever brought to the screen. In my opinion, Blade Runner is the greatest and most influential sci-fi ever made. It set the benchmark for all proceeding non-space based sci-fi, and remains a timeless masterpiece.

 In a world where technology has taken over, we have destroyed the environment and most animals are extinct and corporations have become gods, one can only wonder if Ridley Scott has made an accurate predication of the future.

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The Gambler (2014)

I don't know what message the directer was trying to get across with this mess but I hope it's remains neatly buried in his lower intestine.

A wealthy and successful writer and university professor, Mark Wahlberg, transforms into a compulsive gambling waster every time he steps foot in the seedy and sanitationaly questionable backstreet gambling dens he frequents in his spare time.

While he's not spewing out his self-opinionated absurdly contrived sewage at his students, he tries his best to lose as much money as possible betting ridiculous amounts on games of blackjack, whilst pissing off gangsters, loan sharks and his millionaire mother in the process. What the motivation is for his behavior is anyone's guess: rebelling against his wealthy upbringing, living inline with his chaos theory-like, nihilistic, bullsh1t philosophy of life..? Whatever his motivation, he comes across as the most loathsome little sh1t imaginable.

 To cut a long story short, he pays off his debts and decides he's not a gambler anymore, making most of this terrible tripe a pointless build-up to nothing. I was hoping his creditors would at least castrate or torture him to death, what a shame.

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Chappie (2015)

It was a good idea directed badly. For most of the film I kept asking myself if it were all a joke or if I was hallucinating, surely no one could have intentionally created characters as ridiculous and a script so lame as this. And so the plot goes: Dev 'Slumdog' Patel plays a scientist who has created a robot police force which has cut crime in Johannesburg by 90% Hugh Jackman, his rival in the same robotics company and is himself looking for approval to deploy his own much larger robot. It's just like the plot of Robocop, but instead of having Clarence Boddicker and his gang to deal with, the robot police have a collection of unlikely and brightly coloured villains, who look like characters from 90's video games.

 After an accident, one robot in the factory is due to be scrapped, but Dev Patel saves him and implants his new breakthrough artificial intelligence software into the droid's memory. The mindless automaton becomes self aware but has the mind of a child, at which point the young scientist is kidnapped by a gang of criminals, who intend to use 'Chappie' the newly conscience robot, to pull off a daring heist. Now most of the film is wasted with the attempts of the inept and quite frankly ridiculous looking criminals to teach Chappie how to be a criminal. These bad ass gangsters have an affinity for brightly coloured things, crap haircuts, and even worse tattoos. That, and the acting from the trio of crims leaves a lot to be desired. Hugh Jackman, who looks just as silly as the criminals in this weird film - looking like a cross between Indiana Jones and Steve Irwin - eventually turns bad, and tries to kill everyone in sight with his huge battle robot , 'The Moose'.

 If it weren't for the battle scenes I'd have 2-starred this film. The entertaining and impressive special effects during such scenes was just what I was expecting from Blomkamp. It's just a shame that he didn't pay as much attention to the rest of the film. It could have been the new Short Circuit (or a least a very violent Short Circuit.) I liked the ending, which leaves you wondering about a possible sequel. All in all, a bit of a misfire from Blomkamp who, as he proved with District 9, is capable of a lot better.

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Dead Snow (2009)

This low budget Norwegian zombie flick shouldn't really work, but it does. Filled with every single horror movie cliche and trope, it's one of those films that are ridiculous in a good way. The story revolve around a group of medical students on holiday in the remotest part of the Norwegian wilderness they could find.

The characters are the biggest cliche of all, from the deadlocked women who looks like a predator, the quintessential attractive blondes, to the fat film geek guy - who is the source of many a horror movie reference during the film.

After the unlikely group settle in, the not so unlikely drunken party starts, a party which is soon interrupted by a knock of the door of the cabin...The knock is the local weirdo with a scary tail to tell. The man proceeds to tell the group about the legend of a lost Nazi battalion whose evil presence remains on the mountain.

Well it doesn't take long before the man's fears are realized, and the group soon start dropping like flies, and it drops to a few remaining to survivors to face the ravenous army of Nazi zombies. The group of remaining characters, one resembling Ash from Evil Dead, with an amputated arm and chainsaw combo, dispense with the zombie horde in more and more over-the-top and super gory ways.

The special effects are pretty convincing for such a low budget indie film, and each zombie death is more original and mega gory  than the next. Dead Snow is good old-fashioned comedy horror fun. A little indie gem which is up there among the best comedy horrors that I've seen.

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Dead End (2003)

On Christmas Eve Frank Harrington (Ray Wise) is driving  his family to his in-laws for Christmas and decides to take a shortcut. Things soon start to go wrong, as the road they are on seems neverending and they are terrorised by the ghost of a young woman.


The film is described as a 'horror thriller' on its IMDb page, but to me it seemed more like a comedy, mainly due to the hilarious antics of Frank Harrington himself. With constant over-the-top reactions and wise cracks, Ray Wise is hilarious in this film. With his dum daughter, annoying son in-law and crazy wife nagging him all the way, he soon starts to crack up.


The family members soon start disapearing one by one, and the last you see of them are their faces stuck to the back window of a mysterious black hurse which drives past them in part of some morbid death ritual.


The film feels like a horror version of National Lampoons Christmas Vacation. By the way they are set up, even the scares seem like they are meant to be funny rather than scary. Dead End isn't to be taken seriously as a horror, even if that was what the director intended.

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